Pretty Girl Dilemma: Would You Date Me, Beautiful?

written by Raminta Paukstyte

Pretty girls are the happiest girls in the world: they have the man and job of their dreams; they are the people everybody wants to be friends with. Until this very moment, when the success ends, love is gone and those “friends” seem happier than ever before. The only thing that left is to be an object of desire. It’s not that easy.

I’d never thought what exceptional are the lessons of life I can get working as a bartender. “Be careful, there are many men who will try to get into your pants”, whispered stranger once. “I know”, I remember, was my answer....

The truth is I don’t realise sometimes, how often I get much attention from men only because they think how pretty I am. Honestly, I give many efforts to believe that there might be more reasons, why they fancy me, but, unfortunately, there is usually nothing just that. You might think it is easier for me, but actually it is harder to know when somebody is saying that beyond the surface.

“But at least you get that attention, so shut up b*tch!”- is that something what you all are thinking about? Yes, I do get it, but do you really think this is what truly makes you feel happy? “Every time I come to this bar I fall in love with this girl.” “You’re beautiful.” “Thank you.” “You’re absolutely beautiful”. “Thank you!” “Do you have a boyfriend?” “Yes.” [Lying] “Please, smile!” “No. I don’t want to.” “Why?” “Because I am sad.” [Bartender. Is. Crying]. Why I was lying and why was the bartender crying?

That is far from enough to fulfil my expectations to meet a man of my dreams. Let’s blame fairytales and movies that make you think about “the happy end”. OK, talking about love, it doesn’t necessary have to be true. I consider my romance criteria (like any other girl I suppose?) rational if not mature, and this is what lets me down so much: that won’t last, and even being pretty can not handle with it.

People change, don’t they? I’d never guessed how ruthless I can become after hearing those compliments repeated for me all over again and again. Fake words, fake smiles, fake expectations, and fake people and fake me- I just can’t take it anymore.

It is so hard to believe in what people say. My “no” became stronger than ever before; I did not actually care much about the hurt looks on their faces. I stopped thinking of connivances at all. I relied on extremity instead. I stopped being myself for a while… The question here: was HE really worth THAT?

And only recently I decided to reorganize my thoughts about that by giving a chance for someone I like and started listen to my heart again. Feelings, you say? They are always here. “Love never change; those feelings are always here just they are transferred to another person”, a male friend says.

I am half-joking, of course, grasping so much from my own experience, as if it’s something nobody else have heard about and have never experienced. I know my personal life would not make the front-page news right now, but I believe there are many girls who might think: “Look at her, she is beautiful, life is much easier for her.” Think once again.

“Bartending life-school” keeps me refreshing. “Do you have a boyfriend? Would you go on a date with me?” [That person could be my grandfather. He looks really old. Cynic, random joke- isn’t it?] I disgusted so much of what was just being asked; tried to calm down and then again: “Would you date me? “[Pause] “I have money, you know…”

That just killed me. But this is something we should deal with.